Way of Being


We are finding more and more that folks in leadership positions want someone to talk to. Actually, most just want someone who will listen to them. Who will sit with them. Who will be present with them. Who will offer a question or two. Who will empathize with them. Who will just be there for them.

My colleagues and I serve as coaches. It is really what we do in all that we do. I just wasn’t sure how to put that in a “box”.

Christian Van Nieuwerburgh was introduced to me last April as I was learning from Jim Knight in Kansas at the Instructional Coaching Group’s Intensive Instructional Coaching Institute. I got to be with Christian in several of his sessions at the Teaching-Learning-Coaching Conference in Kansas City earlier this month.

I loved learning from him. Even more, I loved that he helped me name my practice:

“A Coaching Way of Being”

Christian, in his book, An Introduction to Coaching Skills: A Practical Guide, talks in some detail about Carl Rogers, the influential human psychologist, and his “way of being” as a therapist. Christian also applies Jim Knight’s “Partnership Principles” to this idea and has come up with attributes that help lead one to a “coaching way of being.”

As I look at these attributes, I can’t help but think that surely this is the way a person may choose to live life. While many of these take a lifetime of learning and development, they are attainable. See if they apply to you…I’m still practicing:

*The most effective coaches are humble.

*The most effective coaches are confident in their ability as coaches.

*The most effective coaches care about people.

*The most effective coaches believe that their coachees will achieve more of their potential.

*The most effective coaches treat others with respect.

*The most effective coaches have integrity.

*The most effective coaches demonstrate intercultural sensitivity.

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